We all have those moments of doubt – not just in the decisions we have made so far but in our very selves. Questions like:
“Am I good enough?
Do I have it in me to achieve this?
Am I too weird to be accepted?
What if someone sees through the person I really am, will I freak them out?”
The list of questions that stem from self-doubt are endless. At least, I have had 1000 different ones run through my mind in different situations.
Despite these unpleasant thoughts, we all aspire. Probably for very different things, but we all do.
However, sometimes (or most of the times in my case) these aspirations find themselves to be quite aimless and all over the place. Some people aspire for that perfect job or the perfect body or the perfect idea for a business or the perfect social lives or the perfect travelogues or perfect homes – or just perfect “everything.”
In the times we live today, it’s easy to find 100 success stories everyday (if you subscribe/follow the right publications, read the right books – you’ll read or hear about them all the time) It’s one thing to get inspired (which I’m sure we most definitely do) but it’s another thing to get intimidated.
This sense of fear often leads us to ask ourselves questions about our own choices, capabilities.
I keep asking myself – am I doing things right? Is this what these successful people (everywhere) would have done?
At times when the outcome of my choices aren’t perfect, I end up believing everyone else would have probably done things way better than I did. I often find myself overlook my small achievements – in the scheme of achieving the “BHAG” (Big, Hairy, Audacious Goals).
This sense of under achievement tends to make us feel insignificant, bogged down – which is exactly the opposite of what we started out to achieve – and a lot of the times we find ourselves give up on our aspirations – bit by bit or sometimes – entirely.
Steve Jobs once said “If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Never settle.” And often, that’s exactly what we do. We just settle.
Aimlessness, I believe, is the most beautiful part of the story we are writing about our lives. What’s the fun if everything was perfectly planned and figured out? If we knew exactly how successful we would be 10 years or 20 years from now? Or how we will end up defining our perfect lives in the time to come ourselves?
It was meant to be uncertain – and so it is. It was meant to baffle our minds, surprise us, shock us even.
When I read/meet/hear about the successful men and women these days, I remind myself – they were as aimless as I am at some point, probably still are. Who knows?
And then I quietly murmur to myself – I’ll figure it out eventually too. And even if I don’t, that’s okay. I will still have something fun, crazy, spontaneous to look back to. I will be fine.
After that, I just breathe.